“Boy” Racers.

To all boy racers out there (mostly men trying to be young) I would just like to say even though it’s cold outside you still put your window down so that people can hear your annoying rave music. I’m not being horrible but people don’t only not want to hear it, they also don’t want to see your “attempts” at dancing which only makes your situation more embaressing. Not to be rude but: you’re not cool so please wind your window up and continue your life trying to be like a normal human being, thanks. That is all-rant over.

My Night At Kerry’s Humble Abode.

My night started at Tiblet’s house where we listened to music and had a few drinks and ended up drunk before we arrived at Kerry’s . We got to Kerry’s and drank but ended up having the front room dominated by boys (who i later hit with a whip ) so we sat in the hallway eating raw chips. I tried to have caffiene to sober me up but didn’t realise I was in fact drinking decaf tea. All in all it was a good night but if you do want to sober up i do advise you to read the teabag box to double check you’re not about to waste your time .

Accident

Ok so i’m in work and casually talking on the phone when I need to get a file. I’m on my swivel chair (and of course i’m lazy) and i swivel to the other side of the room to get it when i hear a crash. The computer monitor and phone has come off the desk. Let’s just say: check to see if you’re phone is wireless or not otherwise destruction will follow. Note: don’t swivel across the room while still on a phone with a chord.

Trying to get peace? Be around everyone!

Ok i’m lazing on the sofa bored as hell with a shit loada noise surrounding me but no-one disturbed me…I go to my room to get some peace and suddenly everyone needs me! First of all people are coming in my room to see where i was because and I quote from my mum “we’d thought you’d dissapeared”, even though it’s phsyically impossible to vanish into thin air it still crossed their minds. 5 minutes later they come up stairs to see if i’m still there (like i’m going to escape through my window) and see if i’m ok, if I was being murdered then I would of screamed and not suffered in silence so either i’m ok or asleep, either way disturbed.

As I just wrote that my mum comes in again “are you okay?”, yet again i’m still alive…and AWAKE! This continues for half an hour and so-on. Finally ten minutes of peace so I decide to take a nap but that didn’t go to plan. My stepdad comes in and said “do you know the football score?”, not only do I not like football so I don’t watch it, neither do I care, the game finished five minutes ago, he was watching, I wasn’t. So unless a fucking miracle has occured and i’m now phsycic to football scores and he has memory loss then I wouldn’t know.

I go downstairs and sit on the sofa next to them (giving up my attempts of peace) neither of them say a word and continue watching telly in silence.

So here’s a tip if you want peace be around people, if you’re lonely go to your room because i’m sure as hell people will be up to question you. Humans can sense when someone wants to be alone so naturally they interfere..they’re odd and annoying creatures that like to disturb people when they’re not required to do so just for the pure pleasure of pissing me off.

How To Make The Parents Shut Up.

So you’re casually doing nothing and your parents decide they’re bored and have nothing better to do than bother you so along they toddle and start nagging. Today the subject is why haven’t I taken down my washing basket? She’s going on for ages and I cba to listen to her because i’m trying to concentrate on the t.v. So basically the bottom line is if you tell them you’re pregnant they get confused giving you enough time to re-locate your lazy ass. Note: this doesn’t work for boys although you may get longer confusion time.

Hello world!

This is going to be a long and confusing journey since I have no idea what i’m doing.